A must see

Absolute must watch documentary on BBC2 about the Covid-19 pandemic, tomorrow night at 9.00pm.

Two brothers from the Wuhan Research Centre, where Trump suspects it was engineered, were due to get on Flight MH370 that mysteriously disappeared. It seems they were the guys behind the development of the new strain, and intending to use it as a weapon. Someone caught wind of their plans and purposely downed the plane. BUT… neither of them got on the flight and no-one knows what happened to them. It’s really interesting …

Don’t miss it … it’s called ‘Two Wongs Don’t Make a Flight!’

Mortgage Broker

Sadie Moskowitz was bored in retirement so she decided to go back to work. She got a job as a telemarketer for a mortgage broker. This was one of her calls.

“Hello,” said the man.

“Hi, it’s Sadie from Mortgage Financial. Do you have a second mortgage on your home?”

“No,” the man replied.

“Would you like to consolidate all your debts?”

“I really don’t have any,” the man said.

“How about freeing up cash for home improvements?” Sadie tried.

“I don’t need any. I just recently had some done and paid cash,” the man replied.

There was a brief silence, and then Sadie asked, “Are you married? My daughter’s still single!”

Johnnie Walker

Moishe a Jewish cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. “Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse ?!?!?” he yelled with surprising forcefulness.

No one answered. “Alright, I’m gonna have another beer, and if my horse ain’t back outside by the time I finish, I’m gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don’t like to have to do what I dun in Texas!”

Some of the locals shifted restlessly. The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse has been returned to the post. He saddled up and started to ride out of town.

The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, “Say partner, before you go … what happened in Texas?”

The cowboy turned back and said, “I had to walk home.”

Equipment

One morning a husband returns to the cabin after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out, since it is such a beautiful day. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says,” Good morning, Ma’am, what are you doing”?

“Reading a book,” she replies, (thinking, “Isn’t that obvious”?)

“You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,” he informs her.

“I’m sorry, officer, but I’m not fishing, I’m reading.”

“Yes, but you have all the equipment. I’ll have to write you up a ticket.”

“For reading a book”? she replies.

“You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,” he informs her again.

“But officer, I’m not fishing, I’m reading.”

“Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I’ll have to write you up a ticket and you’ll have to pay a fine.”

“If you do that, I’ll have to charge you with sexual assault,” says the woman.

“But I haven’t even touched you,” says the Game Warden.

“That’s true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.”

“Have a nice day ma’am,” and he immediately departed.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It’s likely she can also think.

Sure God created man before woman. But then you always make a rough draft before the final masterpiece!!!