CONFUCIUS FOR ADULTS

OK to let a fool kiss you, but not OK to let a kiss fool you.

Kiss is merely shopping upstairs for real merchandise downstairs.

Better to lose a lover than love a loser.

Man with broken condom often called Daddy.

Drunken man’s words often sober man’s thoughts.

Marriage is same as bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.

Viagra just like Disneyland …… one hour wait for 2-minute ride.

Joke is just like sex. Neither any good if you don’t get it.

Virginity like bubble on stream of life, one prick, and it’s gone forever.

Man who eat many prunes, get good run for money.

Baseball is wrong: Man with four balls cannot walk.

Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night.

It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

Man who fish in other man’s well often catch crabs.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.

Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.

Man who leaps off cliff, jumps to conclusion.

A Lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!

Robbery

A thief entered a house mid-afternoon. He tied up the woman and at knife-point asked the man to hand over the jewelry and money.

woman

The man started sobbing and said, ‘You can take anything you want. But please untie the rope and free her.ā€™

Thief: ‘You must really love your wife!ā€™

Man: ‘Not particularly, but she will be home shortly.’