Monthly Archives: January 2016
A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 5:30 after work.
His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in.
“My hair & makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I’m still in my pajamas and I can’t be bothered with cooking tonight! Why the hell did you bring him home?”
Husband answers: “Because he’s thinking of getting married.”
George and the Dragon
A vagabond, tired and hungry, was trudging along a country road in England when he came upon a roadside inn called “George and the Dragon.”
He knocked on the door.
The innkeeper’s wife stuck her head out of a window.
“Could ye spare some food please?” he asked.
The woman looked at his wretched condition and said, “No!” – rather sternly.
“Might I have a pint of ale then, please?”
“No!” she snapped again.
“Might I just sleep in your stable please?”
“No!” She was fairly shouting.
He tried again: “Might I please…?”
“What now?” the woman screamed.
“Might I have a word with George?”
These Dudes Took Advantage Of The Blizzard And Snowboarded Through NYC
It’s Not About The Nail
THE GOLDBERG BROTHERS
The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Max, invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner. On July 17, 1946 , the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees.
The four brothers walked into old man Henry Ford’s office and sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four gentlemen were there with the most exciting innovation in the auto industry since the electric starter.
Henry was curious and invited them into his office.
They refused and instead asked that he come out to the parking lot to their car.
They persuaded him to get into the car, which was about 130 degrees, turned on the air conditioner, and cooled the car off immediately.
The old man got very excited and invited them back to the office, where he offered them $3 million for the patent.
The brothers refused, saying they would settle for $2 million, but they wanted the recognition by having a label, ‘The Goldberg Air-Conditioner,’ on the dashboard of each car in which it was installed.
Now old man Ford was more than just a little anti-Jewish, and there was no way he was going to put the Goldberg’s name on two million Fords.
They haggled back and forth for about two hours and finally agreed on $4 million and that just their first names would be shown.
And so to this day, all Ford air conditioners show —
Lo, Norm, Hi, and Max — on the controls.
Moleskine: Stop Motion video
Jimmy Kimmel Explains Passive Aggressive Texts