A hippie gets on a bus and sees a very hot nun sitting near the back. He sits near her, and decides to take a shot, “Hey, you’re pretty hot. Wanna have sex with me?”
The nun screams and runs off the bus at the next stop, obviously very freaked out. The hippie, feeling defeated, decides to get off the bus as well. The bus driver stops him and says “Hey, I saw you trying to get with that nun. She goes to this cemetery every Wednesday night and prays in front of this gravestone. Maybe if you dress up like God or something you can get her to do what you want.” The hippie thinks this is a great idea, and gets together a God costume.
Wednesday comes around, and the hippie is hiding in the cemetery bushes. He slips on his God mask and jumps out the nun. “Ahhhh I’m God! I will let you into heaven if you have sex with me!” The nun says “Hmmm … Ok. But it has to be in the butt to preserve my virginity.”
So, they start going at it, and the hippie decides to give the nun a little surprise. So he pulls off his mask and yells “Surprise! I’m the hippie from the bus!”
The nun pulls off her mask and yells “Surprise! I’m the bus driver!”
He was a widower and she a widow. They had known each other for a number of years being high school classmates and having attended class reunions in the past without fail. This 60th anniversary of their class, the widower and the widow made a foursome with two other singles. They had a wonderful evening, their spirits high.
The widower throwing admiring glances across the table. The widow smiling coyly back at him. Finally, he picked up courage to ask her, “Will you marry me?”
After about six seconds of careful consideration, she answered, “Yes … Yes I will!”
The evening ended on a happy note for the widower. But the next morning he was troubled. Did she say “Yes” or did she say “No?”
He couldn’t remember. Try as he would, he just could not recall. He went over the conversation of the previous evening, but his mind was blank. He remembered asking the question but for the life of him could not recall her response. With fear and trepidation he picked up the phone and called her.
First, he explained that he couldn’t remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the past evening. As he gained a little more courage he then inquired of her. “When I asked if you would marry me, did you say “Yes” or did you say “No?”
“Why you silly man, I said ‘Yes. Yes I will.’ And I meant it with all my heart.”
The widower was delighted. He felt his heart skip a beat.
Then she continued. “And I am so glad you called because I couldn’t remember who asked me!”